I have always loved wearing sarees but I started working towards bringing the saree back when I wrote the article on the 100 Day Saree Pact last year. I found myself wearing sarees and handloom more and more, especially after my mom passed away. I don’t even know if there is any connection (she had stopped wearing sarees as she grew older) but maybe it’s my way of holding on to my roots and memories. And, however insignificant it might be, I decided to work towards promoting it in my own small way through my blog and Instagram. Continue Reading
Children’s day has always been something we celebrated in school and that tradition continues with my son too. It has meant going to a carnival organised by his school and nothing more than that. However, this year I have been thinking of ways to surprise him with something without spending too much money yet making it special. I always wanted him to grow up fast when he was a toddler and now I’m holding on to the few years l have left before he goes in to his teens when I can still do things which he might not roll his eyes for. So here are few things that can be done – Continue Reading
Anyone who has followed my blog for any length of time knows that I never claim to be a great parent. For me, it is a journey of learning that helps me evolve both as a mother and as a person. One of the most valuable lessons that I have learnt is that we, as parents, are very generous with the word ‘no’ (and strangely a video I saw recently triggered this revelation).
Not so much with the time to explain to our children ‘why not’. When Kabir was much younger, I used to fear for his safety around the kitchen. He would come bounding in and in all his enthusiasm and energy, want to help with what I was doing, be it preparing dinner or baking, he wanted to be a part of it. Without giving it much thought, I would say no to him thinking that he will injure himself or would ruin hours of my hard work while I was baking. This went on for a while until he understood that the kitchen is a dangerous place for him and he shouldn’t enter it. Fast forward to a few years later, little did I realize that it would become a part of his subconscious and the one lesson that he would actually remember would be that the kitchen isn’t a place for him. I realize that now and think that maybe I could have handled the situation slightly differently. If only I had chosen to share the experience of baking or cooking with him in a separate controlled environment especially created for him in the kitchen; only if I had chosen to say yes instead of no he might be more interested in cooking and helping around the kitchen rather than it becoming a no-go zone for him.
The truth is that it isn’t just about this one incident. What we don’t realize is that the more we say no, the more we make our children dependent on us and the more we take away their freedom. ‘No’ means it is mummy or papa’s job and I am not supposed to do it. These stay with them even as they enter adulthood and sometimes even through life.
The other, more obvious aspect is of course, the lack of adventure and the spirit of discovery. When we say no we are diminishing the natural curiosity that is so inherent in a child that, over a period of time, the child starts denying their own curiosity on a natural level.
Having said that, I am not in any way saying that we should stop saying no entirely. Only that we are mindful and judicious about when we do. That we assess honestly if there is another way of showing by example what the consequences are or we are honest with ourselves and actually show the child how to take part in an activity for grownups (my kitchen example) – obviously with all precautions as a given. It was only when I finally started saying yes to Kabir in the kitchen and he thoroughly enjoyed that I realized that I had been unfair on him. And this simple gesture didn’t just have an impact on his attitude towards the kitchen but also, progressively, in other areas as well. He started helping me out when guests came, started taking more interest in the food and its ingredients, started talking more about food and the things that he likes.
As I said, I am no expert but I learn lessons whenever I can. And this is one that is to stay with me for life. I am joining the YesMom movement – you too can be a part of it here https://goo.gl/paCJzn
I’m writing this post as I get a lot of mails regarding things one needs to do to be a blogger. It has been almost a 3-year journey for me. I was very erratic in publishing my articles in the first year. I used to publish one article a month, sometimes not even that. I used to constantly question why anyone would want to read what I have to write. Am I adding any value whatsoever. In the last 3 years, I have given up on my blog too many times as well. It’s not easy to put yourself and your life out there. There have been occasions of complete writer’s block and panic. There have been times when I have received little response for the article I have poured my heart into and that’s the most heart-breaking thing. I have cried a lot over it too as I didn’t know anyone in the blogging world with no one to give me direction and I felt helpless. Continue Reading
I have written a bit about how I have suffered from body image issues in my previous blogs and on Instagram. Even though the intensity of how I felt about myself varied, it was at times crippling enough to avoid social outings. When I look back, I realise how I would only wear deep necks and short clothes because I thought it would take away the attention from my face. As I believed (and at times still do) there was something really wrong with it (my face). But as you get older you worry less about the superficial. And if you feel great inside you radiate that feeling. A fit mind and body have a very big role in helping me deal with these issues. But don’t get me wrong I still love wearing deep necks and I’m in better shape than I ever was, just that I don’t wear them to cover my insecurities now. My choice of clothes now is completely dependent on how good I feel in them. If it means tiny shorts and a crop top because I’m on a holiday so be it. I don’t like sticking to one look but lately I find myself buying a lot of cottons as staying in Gurgaon, that’s the best choice of fabric as per me. And as I’m getting older somethings that I look out for are- Continue Reading
I hate to admit it but every year I dread the monsoons. It warms my heart that my son still loves to play in the rain just like he did when he was a toddler, yet I lose sleep over all the diseases that come along during the rainy season. Apart from viral infections, the scarier ones are like chikungunya, dengue and Zika and some which we don’t even know the names of. I have seen some of my friends suffer specially from chikungunya and still complaint of joint pains even after months of apparently recovering from it. On top of that symptoms like fever, rash, joint pain, joint swelling and muscle pain are common among all. Continue Reading
Google has recently launched their Arts & Culture platform in a big way internationally. A part of its project is #SareeOnMe with Google India in which they wanted to showcase real women who wear sarees. And for me it was just overwhelming to be a part of it. The image would in the calendar to be launched in 2018 and has accomplished women from various walks of life. It has been a very humbling experience to say the least. I settled for the simplest and most inexpensive handloom saree that I have (I bought it for Rs 600 recently). I wanted to use this opportunity to prove that even in its simplest form, a handloom saree exudes elegance which is unmatched. All the pictures have been clicked by Naina Redhu. Continue Reading
Whenever I used tell people that I haven’t ever visited Goa, I got the same reaction as I do when I tell people I haven’t watched Sholay yet! Anyway, finally, the jinx was broken and I got to visit Goa. Better still, I got to visit Goa with my son Kabir. We were invited by Novotel Resorts and Spa for a weekend staycation. And only during the staycation, I realised how much we needed it. It had been two years since we got to travel together and the recent loss of our pet was making staying at home tough. Yet, I was jittery as we were supposed to spend two days together, would Kabir enjoy his little vacation with just me around. Continue Reading