As I turn 37 and look back, I feel this is the happiest I have ever been. And no, I don’t have a stable job and it eats me up on most days as I keep trying to figure what I can do to enhance my skills to keep an income coming. But what keeps me content and happy is that I have chosen to write my own narrative and I have taken the power away from most people to affect me. And I also feel that every year it keeps getting better. Last year I wrote about what I do to love myself (read here) and this year I just thought of penning down a few new learnings –
1) Not all friendships last forever, and that’s okay. Probably the biggest lesson I learned this year. Everyone evolves differently and a point comes when you can no longer connect with the person or your values and fundamental beliefs don’t match any more. It hurts a lot but letting go is the only way to be.
2) I have made an effort to take care of my skin and teeth. Sounds shallow? As I grow older, I feel it makes a lot of difference to me, radiant skin and a good set of teeth make me more happy than a perfect dress.
3) I think I have finally understood the meaning of “build boundaries, not walls”. While I let people in, I don’t let them hurt me easily. That privilege lies with a select few only. I think that’s what happens when you finally learn to love yourself and know your worth.
4) However farcical it might sound, setting positive intentions truly make a difference. That’s the way I have learned to mind my own business. And when I mind my own business, I work harder towards my goals. It does sound straight out of some self-help book but it works for me.
5) I tried to “fit in” always and realised I just can’t. I somehow just couldn’t be a part of social settings however hard I tried. Most of the social gatherings left me fatigued and robbed me of my happiness. I cried for years over it as I thought something’s really wrong with me. And then I decided to break free of it, meet and only spend time with people I feel good with. And finally, I have found strength in not fitting in rather than treating it like my weakness.